The Ramblings of a Frazzled Mind

Hello, toasters!
It's times like this I wish I could just fly away and have a holiday to escape the January Blues & English weather.
I'm now at that point after Christmas where I'm eating everything and never feeling full.
It seems that I've only just had dinner when my asshole of an inner conscious tells me that i need chocolate ASAP.
The only thing keeping me from eating my own weight in chocolate is my chocolate machine that I got for Christmas, because to get the chocolate I need to give it 10p. And 99% of the time, I don't have even that much going spare.
At the moment, my bank balance is in minus figures.
It would be okay, but my bank texts me every morning just to remind me how poor I am.
This is terrible for three main reasons:
1. I'm broke and a general failure at life.
2. I now begin every day with a bout of depression
3. They always text me waaaay too early, so I start each day sleepy and sad. A mix that any student after hand-in can tell you is bad.
Thanks, Bank.
I feel like I'm really busy this term, with no time for anything but my work.
Whilst I am glad that I'm completely throwing myself into my work, I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss wasting away three days on tumblr/pinterest/netflix/youtube/all of the above.
I know this post is short, and not at all focused, but my brain is honestly frazzled. I don't know how long i'll feel like this- like some sort of bewildered being that isn't quite registering anything- but hopefully it passes pretty quick.
I'll leave you with this... my favourite Sherlock meme for season 3

See you soon
Sammie
xoxo

P.S. if would mean the world to me if you could fill in this quick survey about Opera? You really don't have to know anything about Opera, but it's for my project and only 5 questions long... pleeeeease?!

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The Last Supper (before I'm back to malnourishment at my student house)

Hello, toasters!

Today I am writing to you from my brand new laptop- a white HP Pavilion laptop that is cooler than the arctic itself. 

However, to get said laptop, I had to go to PC World. For four hours!

Before this, I had just made a 2 hour journey, which put me through the terrifying ordeal of having someone nearly sit next to me on public transport.

Oh, the horror!

So, aside from almost committing mass genocide in PC World, I think my sanity has just about clung on & is still with me. 

I think...

I'm intending to do an illustration for each post, so hopefully i'll improve bit by bit :)

Tomorrow morning, I will be travelling back down to Bournemouth, as I start Uni again on Monday.

I resent this fact for two main reasons: 

1.  I have to be up at 8am, which is a greatly unreasonable hour for a nocturnal person such as myself.
2.  Whilst I can cook, I can't afford the quality of food that my mum can here at home.

I will be going from grand roast dinners with all the trimmings to a sandwich from the Co-Op, which may or may not contain real chicken and arguably smells like a pensioner.

Mmmm, I love the smell of pensioner in the morning.

However, there are several things I am looking forward to...

1.  Seeing all my housemates and friends again, cracking inappropriate 'Your Mum' jokes 24/7 and generally being goofy.
2.  Being a 30 second walk away from Iceland, which has a good offer on for Pringles.
3.  Starting classes again

Whilst I love lying in all day and mooching about the house, I really can't wait to dig my teeth into another project. There's something about having a new project that revives my passion and creativity for the arts.

Also, procrastinating is always more fun when you actually have something to avoid.

So now I have the task of packing everything up, which has become a proper challenge as Mum has turned half of my room into a Chinese Laundry.
Last night I couldn't get to sleep for ages, so instead of counting sheep, I counted how many ugly shirts there were hanging up that would benefit from a bout of spontaneous combustion.
So, the next time I post I'll be back in Bournemouth!
Are you looking forward to going back? Let me know in the comments :)
Don't forget to subscribe you cheeky monkeys
(Sorry, I've been spending too much time watching children's TV... because I have younger siblings.... not because I actually enjoy it...don't judge me)
Sammie
xoxo


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How Every Student Does Their Assignment

Hello, toasters!
So today I handed in my project I've been working on since September, and I'm genuinely buzzing with excitement.
Its either that or the two tubes of Pringles and six-pack of Diet Coke I've ingested over the past 12 hours or so. Either or.
So this past week I've been super busy- sorry for the lack of posts, but you know... I'm paying £8,600 a year for tuition, I may as well roll out of bed in the morning and try.
And by roll, I literally mean roll.
Boy, are all those Pringles coming back to haunt me now.
Like every student, I sort of procrastinated for the best part of 2 months, doing the occasional bit of work when absolutely necessary but nothing too tedious.
Instead, I decided to focus on the more important things in life, like buying new throw pillows and mastering the ancient art of cheese on toast.
I know right, pretty deep stuff.
But this got me thinking about how students do their projects, and looking around the room at hand-in, I noticed a pattern of vacant stares and yesterday's unchanged clothes.
So, I decided that whilst it's fresh in my mind, I'd go through the thought process of every student the night before a big hand in.
Here goes...

8.00pm- So I've got a long night ahead of me, with a slimmer chance of getting a 1st than the chance that Kim Kardashian will sort her life out. Better get some snacks, you know, for motivation.... yeah, motivation, that's it.
8.30pm- I'm a Celebrity is on, I've got plenty of time left, and I can DEFINITELY do work in the advert breaks.
10.00pm- Okay, so admittedly I didn't actually do any work during I'm a Celeb, but I had my sketchbook open on my lap, so I guess that's a step in the right direction
10.30pm- Right, need to find the perfect sound track to help me power through, lets take a quick look through my iPod
 11.00pm- Well, it looks like I don't have anything in my music library that will do. Time to look on YouTube for some music.
11.30pm- Oh look, a funny cat video!
12.00am- Oh God, I only have 8 hours left. Time to really knuckle down
12.05am- Phew, I've written 5 whole sentences, that definitely deserves a 10 minute break.
12.15am- Well before I can do anything, I need the right equipment. And who can do any sort of work without a nice sharp pencil?
1.00am- Alright, so that's all the pencils in a 5-mile radius sharpened to an OCD-level point, and organised in nice straight rows.
1.30am- Man, I could use a snack right now....
*remembers supply of processed crap enough to put an entire army into a coma*
Okay, so I'll just have one teensy tiny snack
2.00am- How the hell am I supposed to work with this huge food baby?! I think a quick power nap is necessary, just to get rid of it and re-energise me for work. Half an hour should do it, no more though!
4.00am- Why did I think getting into a warm bed was a good idea!?!? Now I have to sit in my room which has is colder than Piers Morgan's heart, and no amount of onesies will stop me shivering.
4.30am- 2,000 words, here we come. Okay Wikipedia, don't fail me now!
5.00am- Damn I'm going to need some references... I'm sure that book on Lucian Freud is around here somewhere, and he's always relevant. Essay on why pop culture is becoming an overpowering influence in society? Why, because women secretly want penises of course!
6.00am- I wonder if McDonalds start serving breakfast yet?
6.15am- Come on now, focus! How can I make the 1,200 words I have seem like a lot more? Time for some double-spacing and large font methinks.
6.30am- OH CRAP I COMPLETELY FORGOT MY EVALUATION JKBFJKBUIOP
6.45am- Okay, so here's last term's evaluation.... I'm sure if I just change a few choice words here and there it'll be fine. No one even reads these things anyway, right?
7.00am- Time to attempt to make this jittering wreck of a person presentable... enough to walk to uni, grunt hellos and dump my suspiciously large-fonted work into a box.


I don't know about you, but that last bit never works for me. I always look like a car crash, and its always a 50/50 chance as to whether or not I'm still wearing a pajama top.
I even have a pair on 'mum' jeans that I wear to each hand in without fail, they're just so.... understanding.
So for those of you who still have your hand-ins to go, I wish you the best of luck.
As for me, I'll be hibernating and playing on the Sims 2 for a month.
Don't forget to subscribe to my content using http://sammieontoast.blogspot.co.uk/ using the options on the right hand side :)
Sammie
xoxo

Adjusting to life as a student

Hello, toasters!

I'm about a month deep into my second year of uni.
Especially since moving back into my family home for 4 months over summer, I have realised some of the things that make student life... well, studenty.

One thing you never have to think about when merrily living at home is doing the shopping.
I never realised how expensive cheese was!
And yes, you can get the £1 'cheese' from Iceland, but its so rubbery that if you drop it, it will bounce back up and punch you in the face.

Never before have I been quite so precious about nectar points.
So what if I only spent £1.27?
I need those points!
It's seriously becoming a problem- like as if I'm addicted to drugs.
The other day I spent £2.50 in Sainsbury's, walked halfway home before I realised I hadn't collected my points, and went back to get them!
What is my life turning into?!?!
And then, when you get home, you have to try and fit everything into your one little freezer drawer.
I can definitely say, that I have become a master of this.
It's like an expert game of Tetris in my freezer drawer.
Life Skill = Gained. Thanks, University.

Whilst I love my house, you do have to get used to some really odd combinations of mis-matched furniture.
In my living room for example, we have two sofas- one a forest green and one a brilliant red that makes your eyes hurt if you look at it in daylight.
I know that's not really a huge sticking point, but it does make you appreciate the purposefully styled rooms at your family home when you go back.

One thing I have learnt about myself is that I'm actually a pretty good cook!
(See a recent post here that has one of my recipes)
This came as a huge shock to everyone, as before my Dad used to joke that I could burn water.
But no, I actually buy fresh ingredients, combine them in interesting ways and I have never, ever eaten a pot noodle.
The worst thing that happened to me kitchen-wise was my very first attempt to cook when I first moved in as a fresher.
I was cooking a pizza (very simple, I know) and so I just put it in the oven and waited.
There were only two problems to this plan...
1. Our oven has no temperature markings. You turn the dial, but the markings have long since rubbed off. So, to start with, it was like a fun game. I think I must have turned it around to what I believe is about 300 degrees that night.
2. After I put the pizza into what must have been a furnace, I became distracted. I can't remember what I was distracted by, but as I am an art student, it was probably something like a butterfly or my own boobs.
So when I eventually remembered I was cooking something (probably about 40 minutes later) it came out looking pretty burnt.
And by pretty burnt, I mean 100x more burnt than the stereotypical English guy who falls asleep on holiday in Spain in the sun all day and has to go around looking like a tomato for 3 months after.
So if having a pizza that was blacker than a politicians heart wasn't bad enough, I only went and dropped it on the floor!
I think I may have cried at this point. Or again, became distracted by my own boobs.
I just know that I definitely missed the 3-second-rule time limit.
But still, I was just so hungry, I picked it up and ate the bits that were still recognisable as a pizza.
This, dear toasters, is a fact I am not proud of, so please don't judge me!

Doing the washing is also something that gets me.
Because my laundry basket is only being filled by me, it takes a long time to get full.
And even when it is full, you do the same thing you do with the bins and squash it all down so it will last a little longer.
So I'd say that wash day only comes up every 2 weeks.
But when it does come up, I do 5 washes (1 white, 2 colours, 2 black washes) in a row and EVERYTHING is hung out to dry in my room.
So for about 2 or 3 days, I cant move in my own room, it becomes a rainforest of clothing.
Sometimes, its kinda cool.
I can make a slightly-damp blanket fort out of the set of sheets I've washed and hide away from the outside world and the concept of 'doing work'.

I will leave you on this note- Internet shopping is your best friend and your worst enemy rolled into one!
Yes, you can get some amazing deals that make your life (and bank balance) so much better.
But, be warned.
The other day, I went through my Ebay purchase history and realised quite how much stuff I had bought.
And by stuff, I mean things that I love, but if I'm being very honest with myself, it could be classed as 'crap I don't need'.
For example, today my Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends DVD came in the post!
Now don't get me wrong- I loved this show!
But if I'm honest, the £3 I paid for this could have been spent on something a little more nessecary. Like stationary. Or a subway.

Oooooh, I want a subway now!

So my question to you all is this: What have you found to be the hardest thing about adjusting to student life? Let me know in the comments!
And don't forget to subscribe if you like my content, so you'll be notified when I post more :)
Sammie
xoxo

Back to School... (and my new favourite easy-peasy recipe)

Hello, toasters!
This past week has been pretty intense, as I've moved back down to Bournemouth and had my first week of second year classes!
But although I'm a second year, I feel more lost than I ever did as a fresher because our classes have now moved to random rooms around the campus.
(I'm sure it's some kind of disorientation power play trick the teachers are using against us to stop us from getting too cocky)


These are the clothes I have bought with me
 for JUST the Winter Term...

One problem with moving back into a student house is the unpacking.
Now we all know how much I love to procrastinate, but I still have loads of  random stuff on the floor that needs to be tidied, and next to the ever-growing stack of pizza boxes, my room is starting to turn into a weird, studenty undergrowth.
Another problem with moving, is the fact I have to share a car with my mum for an extended amount of time.
Don't get me wrong- I love my mum to bits.
It's just always strange to be in what is essentially a travelling metal box for several hours together, especially when you need to choose music.
At home we're okay, because we both like the same local station, but when we get out of range, we're in trouble.
I prefer to put my iPod on, because then there's no adverts, but once we get through all of my Phil Collins stuff, that is when the true test begins.
The problem is not that my mum only likes pre-millennium music and thinks that new music isn't what it used to be.
Oh no, it's the opposite.
She seems to love Pink, Jessie J and other people like that.
The real issue is that I haven't been able to update my iPod in over 4 years.
So every time we go on an extended journey together, I spend the entire time trying to play songs that feel more up-to-date than they really are.
And I think she's starting to realise that songs like 'Meet Me Halfway' have long gone.

Another problem is deciding how to decorate the room!
Although I love my little house, the tidal wave of cream walls is really starting to get to me.
So this year, I thought I'd add a splash of colour with fabric hangings I've got from different countries... what do you guys think?
I'm planning on doing a whole Uni room decoration post soon, so keep a look out for it :)

The most stereotypical issue with student living (aside from arguments over the washing up) is cooking.
It really does get difficult to cook anything too complicated, as 1. you probably won't be able to afford too many ingredients and 2. you could be sharing the kitchen with up to 6 people at the same time!
But this week I got really lucky and had the kitchen to myself for a while, so I made homemade burgers with sweet potato wedges!
It tasted INSANELY GOOD!
And it was really easy to make...

1. Buy some fresh beef mince. (NOT the frozen pellets which look suspiciously like rabbit food)
2. Finely chop an onion and a clove of garlic, and mix with the mince. Don't worry if there's loads of onions left over, you can fry them alongside the burger itself and have with the burger.
3. Peel a sweet potato and chop it into 1cm thick circular pieces.
4. Place them onto a baking tray, put a little oil on them and sprinkle with salt and pepper.
5. Put into the oven at 200 C for 25 minutes or so.
6. When the potatoes have about 8 or 10 minutes left, start frying the burger in a frying pan over high heat with a tiny bit of oil.
7. Serve when everything looks about right (I'm not exactly a Michelin star cook, so I don't know a fancier way to put it)

Om nom nom.
And the best bit? Minimal washing up!

Talking about food, I'd better go and see what I can whip up tonight.
Although, if I'm honest, it looks like a night of re-heated pizza....

Sammie
xoxo

What being Homealone means...

Hello, toasters!
So, the other day, I found myself being homealone.
And somewhere between having a staring competition with the dog and sleeping in a random place (on top of the kitchen table), I decided to make a video exploring the odd things we do in a homealone situation.
Now whether its having more naps than an old person, or allowing yourself to fart loud and proud, we all act differently when alone. Admit it!
....actually, on a side note, I take the former back. I'm a student, who am I kidding? I have more naps in a day than Madonna has adopted children.
So without further ado, here is my 'What Being Homealone Means' video.
Enjoy!

Music by Dan-O at http://danosongs.com

What do you guys do when you're homealone then? Let me know :)
And if you really love me, subscribe using any of the options in the right-hand sidebar
Sammie
xoxo

Five top places to procrastinate on the Internet

Hello, toasters!
As some of you may know, I am the Queen of Procrastination.
(I have even been known to buy new underwear just to put off doing the laundry for an extra day or two- something I am definitely not proud of)
So today I have compiled a list of my favourite places to go on the Internet when I feel like putting off that assignment that really should be getting some attention.
As it happens, I do have a summer project that I need to start, but this list has provided me with a necessary distraction/ excuse/ I'm just lazy.
So without further ado, here are my top five places to procrastinate on the Internet.

1.Tickld.com

Forget memebase. Seriously, this site is the best.
The reason it works so well as a meme site is because there's a proper sense of community, making all the other sites seem dull and emotionless.
Another great thing is the fact that you don't even have to sign up to get to feel like a member of this bizarre, yet tightly knit online world.

Click here to go to tickld.com

2.Points in Case- the fine print of college life

 

This site has a whole range of guest bloggers who write columns. Originally they were all at college, having very real college experiences. Nowadays, there's more of a diversity of writers, mainly because some of the most loved writers have finished schooling, but have been begged to stay by the readers.

One thing is the same as ever though- how hilarious the content is. Mostly sarcastic, this site is best for those of you who enjoy observational comedy and blogging.

 

Click here for my favourite article on P.i.C. 'The Five Types of Morning Coffee Crazies'

 

 

3. Danisnotonfire's YouTube Channel

 

 

 

If, like me, you used to avidly watch Charlieissocoollike, and are now a teeny bit disappointed because he's become so serious, I suggest Danisnotonfire.

I'm not sure if its because of his epic tee-shirts, or the fact he seems to be a complete hermit, but he is a YouTube sensation for a reason.

I'd personally recommend the 'Men vs. Women', 'Ironic Appreciation', and 'List of reasons why I'm an awful human being' videos.

 

To go to Danisnotonfire's YouTube Channel, click here

 

 

4. Engrish.com

 

 

 

I'm not sure if this website counts as racism, but it's damned funny.

Essentially, people submit pictures of signs/ menus/ products or anything they find with a funny spelling mistake or altered meaning as they go about their travels in the world.

Not quite as addictive as sites like Tickld, but definitely good for spending 5 or 10 minutes on.

 

Click here to visit www.engrish.com

 

 

5. Play the Slender Man Game

 

 

So while this game may lack the incredible graphics of modern PS3 and Xbox games, it's still genuinely creepy.
Perhaps not when you're playing it, but especially at night when you're walking around a cold, darkened house.
The object of the game? Find all of the pages scattered around the woods. Simple.
The catch? This creepy motherfucker.
Look at him too long and he'll get you.
Don't run when he's close and he'll get you while your screen turns to static.
I recently played this at a house party one night, and maybe it was the alcohol, but I think I am mentally scarred for life.
(I am a chicken. But it's still creepy)

To download this game, google search 'download slender' and choose one that suits your operating system. But to all the cowards out there, don't say I didn't warn you!

So there we have it- some of my favourite ways to waste time on the internet instead of doing actual things.
If you can think of other interesting places in this digital world we call home, let me know in the comments!

My next post should be up in 2 or 3 days, but to get a direct notification, subscribe to Sammie on Toast using one of the options in the right-hand sidebar!

Happy Camping,
Sammie
xoxo

Challenge no.30- Play Drunk Monopoly

As many of you may know, taking a fun-but-frustrating family classic and adding alcohol to it makes it infinitely better.
Take Christmas, for example. When I was a kid, I knew Christmas was the best day of the year, without fail. But as the years have ticked by, and I find myself having to do proper, adult things like buying presents for everyone (especially on a student budget... namely NOTHING) I can definitely see why alcohol is everywhere- in the chocolates, on puddings, eggnog etc.
BECAUSE WITHOUT IT WE'D GO INSANE!
Think about it- everything in the holiday period would make our heads explode in any other months...
Listening to the same, 30 year old Christmas songs on repeat since November?
Having people knock on your door expecting money for 4 lines of We Wish You A Merry Christmas?
Paying ten times as much for everything? And then not even knowing if the person will even like their gift!
PASS ME THE GODDAMN EGGNOG
You see?!
Now I am willing to bet that each and every one of you has had a bad experience with monopoly, because, let's face it, who hasn't?
Whether it was the start of a lifelong family feud, or hitting rock bottom by stealing money from the bank, it's ok. We've all been there.
So earlier this year, I took the initiative and created Drunk Monopoly
I'm probably not the first person to have ever done it, but it's still pretty awesome.
And the funny thing is, the first time I played drunk monopoly, I was almost bankrupt right away. However, as I got more tipsy, and my housemates stayed sober, I got better and better and better, and they even had to form an alliance to try to survive!!!
I wiped the floor with them, and as my win was so glorious, I half believed the alcohol had magic properties...
So here are the rules my friends, so that you too can be victorious!

1. Every time you pass Go, take a shot
2. If you land on Go, as well as taking £400, you need to take 2 shots
3. If you're in jail, make a dirty mans pint and finish it by the end of your sentence
4. Because no-one likes the asshole that lands on free parking, make them wear something ridiculous as a token of revenge, until the next person lands on free parking.
5. If you come second place in a beauty contest, drown your sorrows and just generally give up on life.
6. As I own the Lord of the Rings version of monopoly, whoever is last to say 'we're taking the hobbits to Isenguard' when you land on Isenguard takes a shot.

So those are my rules for drunk monopoly.... you could add your own to it of course! A good one I heard is to take a shot every time you build a hotel, because if you're bringing out the big guns, its only fair to even out the playing field a little.
This is a great game to play if you're getting ready to go out and have about 2 hours, or for a fun night in. Surprisingly, this game gets requested a lot in my student house after a night out at the pub, and games usually last until 1am, or whenever more than half of the participants are having difficulty keeping their eyes open.
Have fun with this!
Sammie
xoxo

Challenge no. 79- Make a list of things you're not very good at

Hey there, Internet!
Today has been the typical day of a student on their summer holiday- primarily fuelled by laziness and trips to the sweets cupboard.
And aside from the majestic llama pinata looking out for me (look out for its' special guest appearance in the video) I've basically been left alone today.
*sad times*
However, I have learnt a few interesting things today

• 1 in 50 Americans executed for murder have the middle name 'Wayne'... (sounds like that's another name for Kate Hopkins to add to her list. If you don't know who I'm talking about, take a minute to watch this video)
• Margaret Thatcher is partially responsible for the invention of Mr Whippy ice cream
• Cow's have different accents when they moo depending on where they come from
• My mum won't buy Ben & Jerry's ice cream when its £3 a tub, but if you say that it's on a 2-for-£6 offer she won't hesitate.... what?!

I have also completed another challenge from my list of 101 Ways to Procrastinate!
So without further ado, here is my vlog post where I talk about Things I Suck At... sorry it turns into a mini book review half way through, but I guess staying on topic is something I'm also bad at!

 

I hope you guys like it :)
Please feel free to leave a comment, I love hearing from you guys!
Sammie
xoxo

P.S.
I've been working on my Youtube channel- Banner design, Thumbnail design etc. Please subscribe, and if you have any feedback, that's awesome!
Byeee

Five annoying people on holiday & Challenge no.15- Tie Die EVERYTHING

Hi everyone :)
I hope you're enjoying summer so far and the unusually hot British weather! Oh, and Andy Murray winning Wimbledon!
Having just come back from a family holiday in Kos- which was beautiful and sunny and all things a holiday should be- I couldn't help but notice a few people that.... well.... these people grind my gears.
The people that I picked out weren't just the average obnoxious holiday makers, oh no.
These are the people that bring a boombox to the pool and play foreign, low-quality drum and bass while everyone else is trying to relax. These are the people that have dieted for months to skip along the beach in their skimpy bikini saying how fat they are. These are the people that shake their sandy towel out right next to you so that you get a face full of sand!
I don't know what there is to be done about these people (we all know who they are! And if you don't know who I'm talking about, I'm afraid its you) but I decided to record all of my thoughts in a vlog so that all of you sane people headed overseas this summer can identify and avoid these 'human beings'.
So without further ado, here is my list of just Five annoying people encountered on family holidays...

....deep breaths....
Okay, well now I've got all of those frustrations out, I have completed another challenge!
*congratulatory music*
Two of my friends came down to my student house in Bournemouth earlier this year, and we decided that we needed to it was our destiny to become hipsters. As you do.
So we donned our skinniest jeans and our most ironic snapbacks, and drove all the way to Matalan. Recording everything on instagram, obviously.
We bought the cheapest skirts we could, and the loudest dyes we could, and set to it...

 

And here are the results.... TA DAAAAA!

 



We then set off to the Harvester looking like a fabulous Gay Pride brigade, and had a beautiful, reasonably nutritious meal.
I still use my shirt to sleep in (its so comfy!) and tie-dyeing is probably the most fun, unique way of jazzing up old, bland clothing- if you haven't tried it already, I'd definitely recommend that you channel your inner hipster and give it a whirl.
Sammie
xoxo

Challenge no.96- Broadcast Yourself on Youtube

Okay, so I was actually pretty nervous about this one! It was quite odd talking to a camera lens at first, but as soon as I got over that, I felt like I could just be me, which was weirdly liberating.

As a disclaimer, in case any of you think I'm some sort of raving alcoholic, I only mentioned the vodka because it was sat on the side & looking at me funny.

So without further ado, here is my first ever vlog, enjoy!

As you may have noticed, I'm doing the challenges in a non-chronological order, just as the opportunities present themselves. I thought I should do this one first because I plan to use video to record the outcomes of some of the other challenges, and the day was so beautiful, and I was in such a good mood- I couldn't resist!

Don't forget to subscribe to see how the rest of the challenges go! Just look in the column on the right hand side for different ways to do so :)

Oh, and please let me know what you thought, I love feedback

Sammie
xoxo

101 Ways to Procrastinate

Upon first glance, you would think that the list below is merely a list.
Oh no, how wrong you are.
You see, it is much, much more than a list. It's a challenge, and a battle plan.
And, if were being pedantic, yes, it is still technically just a list but let's move on...

I, Sammie Lovatt, propose to do all of these with photographic evidence within a year. I understand that I am not allowed to explain to confused members of the public what I am doing, no matter how awkward the situation, or I am to re-start the entrie list.

So, that's my plan of action :) i'll be posting my progress up on here..... should keep me from doing actual work for a little while...

So, without further ado, here is my definitive list of 100 Ways to Procrastinate!

1.  Turn on the internet. Obviously.
2.  Organise your lingerie draw.
3.  Run a bath, sit in the shower end, and run the shower so that it 'rains' on you.
4.  Run a bath and organise a rubber duck war.
5.  Run a bath and become a raisin.
6.  See how long you can watch Mudkip 10 hours for- my record is a whole hour which I completed with 2 of my housemates. I am weirdly proud of that feat.
7. Build a card house, but use custard cream biscuits instead- it can be done!
8. Make bath jelly (with extra sparkles!)
9. Watch a million episodes of Ace of Cakes, attempt to make an amazing cake and fail miserably.
10. Download The Croods game and get addictive- we've already lost Beth.
11. Spend an entire day as a white middle class male who thinks he's an african american rapper... you know the ones i mean.... they usually wear baggy white tee shirts and say 'blud' a lot.
12. Organise a scavenger hunt.
13. Print out pictures of Nicholas Cage and hide them around the house.
14. Make a doll of yourself and friends! Proceed to then either make them outfits and play nicely or stick pins in them. I'd say the former option is more thoughtful...
15. Tie dye tee-shirts! In fact, tie-dye EVERYTHING!
16. Familiarise yourself with the very heart of the internet- cute kitten videos.
17. Learn a Disney Song in French.
18. Apply makeup to transform yourself into the opposite gender.
19. Watch an entire series in a day.
20. Actually stop and chat to the guys that try to sign you up to Netflix at the shopping centre.
21. Draw a moustache on your finger, hold it up to your face and say everything in a French accent.
22. Make a fort in the living room... you can never get too old for this.
23. Pretend that the floor is lava, so you need to stay off the ground. (You could combine this one with #22)
24. Recreate famous paintings in photographs with yourself as the subject.
25. Draw faces on each fingertip and act out a puppet show.
26. Come up with a new Yo Momma joke.
27. Watch that film you've never really felt inspired to watch even though you know you'll like it.
28. Fill a vodka bottle with water and walk down the street drinking it.
29. If you're feeling hardcore, do the previous but walking around Mothercare.
30. Play Drunk Monopoly.
31. Find a way to make custard creams better, so that they don't fall apart so easily!
32. Take a friend (or, if you're lucky to have more than one friend, take more) and go get some silly photobooth pictures taken.
33. Feed a hobo.
34. Buy a Big Issue for once.
35. Play 'Bogies' in a public library.
36. Actually eat the side salad next to the burger!
37. Take a photo with a stranger with a beard.
38. Go gay clubbing and have a fabulous time, darling.
39. Buy googly eyes and stick them on household objects.
40. Name said household objects.
41. Do the milk thing in the supermarket and feel like a bad person.
42. Be a ninja and try not to be seen in a public place.
43. Walk around with your own 'theme song' blasting out.
44. Make a list of 101 ways to procrastinate that aren't really possible- ie. Find Atlantis.
45. Do someone else's work.
46. Subtly move/ alter someone's furniture over a period of a few weeks.
47. Snail races!!
48. Make friendship bracelets
49. Find a pet shop and spend a day making friends with one of the animals.
50. Make a scrapbook of memories.
51. Make one amazing meal for at least four people, completely from scratch.
52. Make a pie chart out of actual pie. Then eat it.
53. Be a pen pal to a lonely pensioner.
54. Narrate everything for a whole day.
55. Cast a friendship spell.
56. Play & watch Yu-Gi-Oh! and get obsessed.
57. Have a BBQ on the beach.
58. Stay awake for 24 hours & see how many things from this list you can achieve.
59. Keep a tamagotchi alive for more than 3 days.
60. Try a craaazy new hairstyle, or wear a wig (that shit cray)
61. Make a Sims family of evil people in the world (Hitler, Keith Lemon etc.) and kill them in creative ways.
62. Photoshop- swap your friends' faces in various photographs.
63. Subscribe to Sammie on Toast! (and i'll love you forever)
64. Compare chocolate bars. And I mean go the whole hog and make a spreadsheet and everything
65. Visit an aquarium
66. Have a picnic in a really unusual place.
67. Complete the Bloons Tower Defence game on difficult
68. Make a Sims family, have a baby and play long enough to watch it grow old and die with no breaks
69. Make smores
70. Hug random pieces of furniture in a public place and see how long it takes for anyone to notice.
71. Pick up random objects with your elbows
72. Draw a self portrait by putting the pen between your teeth, and put the result as your facebook profile picture without explaining.
73. Lick a wall and find a word to describe the taste.
74. Make a pet rock and take it everywhere with you for a week (including the bathroom, to bed etc.)
75. Find someone with a hoodie with their name on (probably a leavers' hoodie or something) and approach them and say 'Oh my gosh! [Insert name here] do you remember me? It feels like it was only yesterday when I last saw you!'.... and see what happens
76. Become an epic photobomber
77. Go stair-surfing!
78. Make a list of awesomely random/ not at all useful things about yourself that you feel the world needs to know about.
79. Make a list of things youre not very good at, just like Jenna Marbles did. Jenna Marbles- Things I Suck At
80. Insert the names of five different chart songs into a conversation without the other person realising
81. Write a note saying 'sorry about the damage to your car' and put it on a random car.
82. Glue a pound coin to the floor and watch people try to pick it up
83. Climb a tree
84. Make your own comic
85. Look up & learn five new words from the dictionary. Just to get you started, how about 'hamartithia', 'ginglyform' and 'nelipot'... They're all real words i promise!
86. Make a bucket list
87. Search your name on urbandictionary.com
88. Dye your hair an unusual colour
89. Dont let a baloon touch the floor!
90. Play chubby bunnies, film yourself doing so, and see if you have the guts to post the monstrousity online
91. Listen to a music genre that you wouldn't usually for a whole hour.
92. Go to Wikipedia, click on the 'random article link' that can be found on the left hand side of the page, and write a song about whatever page comes up. Even if the page doesnt exist.
93. Give yourself amazing scene kid hair
94. Watch Big Bang Theory and say (out loud!) 'that's what she said' after everything Sheldon says
95. Have a flour bomb fight
96. Broadcast yourself on Youtube
97. Translate webpages into various dialects using this site. The redneck option is best!
98. Make a list of things you like about someone. Then give it to that someone & make them very happy.
99. Write a letter using letters cut out of magazines (ransom note style.... by this im referring to how the letter looks, not its content) and send it to a friend.
100. Try to melt a cube of cheese in your mouth.
101. Write a list of 101 ways to Procrastinate!

So, if you're interested in watching someone actually do all of the above mentioned things, watch this space :)

Sammie
xoxo

A Fresh Start...

So I've had a blog before. I loved it- I wrote about my life, things that I was doing and anything I wanted really. But then a few things changed in my life and I stopped feeling inspired.

In the past few months, I really feel like I've rediscovered happiness, and something that has always made me happy is writing in my blog and hearing back from you guys. It genuinely makes me day, so thank you for even reading this in the first place.

However, this time it's going to be slightly different. This time I have a plan of action. I have decided to make this blog about something slightly more specific, rather than just a collection of random mutterings.

So, phase one of my master plan- Think about what I like and what I'm good at doing

Then it struck me.... PROCRASTINATION! That's it! Well, for a start, I must be a skilled procrastinator, because I always do it. And sometimes, I do it so well, that it can be passed off for real, important work.

This brings me onto phase two- Naming my blog.

Sure, I like 'Sammie On Toast'- it's kinda quirky and well, I like toast. But maybe it would be better if I titled it as something more relevant to procrastination?

....

...


Nope, nothing springs to mind. Oh well, I'll just procrastinate a little more and just leave it. Well, I do like 'Sammie On Toast', and I was always follow the if it ain't broke, don't fix it rule.

Title = Done.

Phase three- Deciding what to write.

Now this is why I love the procrastination theme- it means I can be free to write basically anything, but I still have a slight brief to stick to, that will help me keep writing... brilliant!

So, if you'd like to hear about an 18 year old art student finding her way in life and messing around a little bit, watch this space :)

Sammie
xoxo