Some important life lessons I've learned along the way

Hello, toasters!
For those of you who have previously read this blog, you may find it pretty rich that I, of all people, am handing out advice on this untested, eventually-fatal rollercoaster we call 'life'.
But, I'd like to believe that I've learnt a few things whilst making my many, many mistakes, and I wish to share my wisdom with all you lovely people.
Disclaimer: I use the term 'wisdom' very loosely.

First off, you know what they say about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer? Screw that!
Surrounding yourself with people you don't like and/or trust is never going to work well.
What if you become their bridesmaid and they ask you to help them pee in their huge wedding dress?
You get the initial 'eww' with the added bonus of resenting the person because you don't even like them, you just kept them close because some cliche drama told you to.
Good job.

Secondly, don't hoard money like there's no tomorrow. 
If you're saving up for something, then that's great, but I'm talking about the people who constantly save for a 'rainy day' then never use it.
What if today is your metaphorical 'rainy day' and spending £20 on a night out with the girls will cheer you up immensely?
I admit I am really quite broke right now, but I put that down to paying for a school trip in January that I didn't expect to be as expensive as it was. So yes, I am being a teensy bit hypocritical on this one....
But if you want to do something, and your funds allow it, then go for it!
Life is to be lived, not to be indefinitely shut away watching Netflix (although that is a substantial part of it).
Whilst saying yes to everything will probably get you an STI, saying no to absolutely everything will just make you miserable. Whilst you shouldn't go to either extreme, try to find a balance that doesn't result in misery or herpes.

Next up, try to enjoy each type of weather the different seasons bring.
I don't mean every single day, because sometimes the weather can be a complete pain, but every so often just stop to appreciate the power of the wind, or the beautiful stormy clouds before they go.
One of my best experiences in New York was walking around Times Square in the rain. I'd given my coat to my Grandma who had lost hers (of course) and I realised I'd forgotten how fun it was to embrace the rain and let it fall on your skin rather than cover up and run from it.
What I'm trying to say is that learning to appreciate the little things that happen every single day will make things in general seem a lot brighter, and you'll start to notice loads more things that you didn't even know you appreciated.
Personally. I've realised that I really appreciate drivers who actually indicate. Go figure.

Finally, find something or someone that makes you overwhelmingly happy.
It could be an old jumper that smells like home, or Tom Hiddleston's ass. Whatever floats your boat.
Just find something and indulge in it, at least once a week to make you feel great again.
For me, it's my talking Pokemon plushie Snivy. I don't know why, but putting a voicebox into a toy kind of makes it an adorable pet.
It was a toss up between Snivy and my boyfriend, but Dan, you aren't a Pokemon with ridiculously tiny legs so I'm afraid you lost out.
I'll leave you with a photo of Snivy just so you can see how cute she is :3
What life lessons have you got to share? Let me know in the comments & don't forget to subscribe :)

Sammie
xoxo

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Drunk thoughts

The Ramblings of a Frazzled Mind

Hello, toasters!
It's times like this I wish I could just fly away and have a holiday to escape the January Blues & English weather.
I'm now at that point after Christmas where I'm eating everything and never feeling full.
It seems that I've only just had dinner when my asshole of an inner conscious tells me that i need chocolate ASAP.
The only thing keeping me from eating my own weight in chocolate is my chocolate machine that I got for Christmas, because to get the chocolate I need to give it 10p. And 99% of the time, I don't have even that much going spare.
At the moment, my bank balance is in minus figures.
It would be okay, but my bank texts me every morning just to remind me how poor I am.
This is terrible for three main reasons:
1. I'm broke and a general failure at life.
2. I now begin every day with a bout of depression
3. They always text me waaaay too early, so I start each day sleepy and sad. A mix that any student after hand-in can tell you is bad.
Thanks, Bank.
I feel like I'm really busy this term, with no time for anything but my work.
Whilst I am glad that I'm completely throwing myself into my work, I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss wasting away three days on tumblr/pinterest/netflix/youtube/all of the above.
I know this post is short, and not at all focused, but my brain is honestly frazzled. I don't know how long i'll feel like this- like some sort of bewildered being that isn't quite registering anything- but hopefully it passes pretty quick.
I'll leave you with this... my favourite Sherlock meme for season 3

See you soon
Sammie
xoxo

P.S. if would mean the world to me if you could fill in this quick survey about Opera? You really don't have to know anything about Opera, but it's for my project and only 5 questions long... pleeeeease?!

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London Calling

Hello toasters!
This morning I'm heading into to London for a uni trip- where else would we be able to listen to Opera and spend hundreds of pounds on fabric in the same day?!

It's too late to be drawing a new illustration for this post, so I thought
I'd use this 'illustration selfie' I did a few weeks ago :)

Having to get up at 7am tomorrow will be difficult, made even harder by the fact that I have to leave my bonsai trees behind for a whole week.
Seriously, I never thought I could ever be so connected to a plant... maybe it's just a coping mechanism when I get depressed about:

a. My student loan          

b. My 'future'                 

c. Miley Cyrus' existence   

or 

d. All of the above.         

We're visiting Harry Potter world tomorrow, which I am definitely far too excited about.
I had intended to sew myself a Ravenclaw robe to wear- you know, to actually get my £9,000 tuition fee's worth- but it ended up in the bottom of my wardrobe, where all my other half-finished projects go to die.
I need to try and find the self-restraint to not buy a wand, or else you may find me sobbing in a gutter, waving it and whispering 'accio, money'.
(Muggles, beware of HP terminology)

Looking at my overflowing suitcase, I fear I may have done my usual trick- packing everything but the things I actually need.
One year I went to Spain, forgot my swimwear and had to spend my time in ill-fitting, hastily-purchased bikinis that made a synthetic fart sound every time I moved.
(Sorry, that's probably an overshare, but it's the best example I've got)
The worst thing is, I usually remember what I've forgotten just as I reach my destination, so I'll keep you posted as to what vital thing I've left behind this time.
Spoiler alert: It's usually socks.

I hope you all have a fantastic Monday morning, and get to have the lie in that I wont be able to have.
I'm still debating whether or not to bring my laptop along, so if you don't hear from me for a week, you'll know why.
Watch this space
Sammie
xoxo


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Money-Saving Challenge of the week: Not to spend ANYTHING

Hello, toasters!
So in one of my last posts I set myself the challenge of spending absolutely nothing for a whole week.
I survived, so I thought I'd share with you my findings from the past week...

Monday
This was when I decided to challenge myself to not spend anything. My bank had just texted me to let me know how poor I was, so I decided to try and be a super-scrimper on a 1-week trial basis.
I feel that maybe a reason that I was broke was because I'd become slightly addicted to Dominos pizzas, and at £10 a pop, its not the best thing to be having more than once a week.
I took my own lunch into uni (the healthy combination of golden niuggets cereal, a can of coke and an apple) which helped to keep the cost down, but I couldn't help but look longingly at the great-smelling hot food sold in the canteen.
Amount Spent:  Nothing
Mood: Determined to get out of my overdraft
Top tip of the day: When in doubt, take a box of kiddies cereal for lunch

Tuesday
Today was a bit easier, as I had 'independent study'... i.e. the teacher couldn't think of anything to do.
So as I didn't have to go into uni, I didn't have to worry about being tempted by the hot food on offer.
I had tortellini for lunch, and chicken & oven chips for dinner- just using up things from my freezer drawer.
If anyone else is a tortellini fan, I'd say avoid the Asda herb tortellini like the plague.
It has such a gritty texture, I felt like I'd swallowed a beach.
Actually, whilst were on the subject of tortellini, is anyone else currently angry with Sainsburys?
The bastards discontinued the four cheese tortellini I practically lived off last year.
Sorry, that was a bit off-topic, but its an important matter to me!
Amount Spent: Nothing
Mood: Chuffed that I had a four hour lie- in!
Top tip of the day: Avoid Asda where possible in the pasta department

Wednesday
Today was a truly great day for me... I saw Bill Bailey!
And as cool as he was (I was in the fifth row!) the arrival of my mum meant one glorious thing- FREE FOOD!
Usually, we just go to the Harvester, but I found out about this classy Chinese restaurant in town that I wanted to try.
It was incredible, and the best thing was is that it was all-you-can-eat, so we could try everything. Twice.
Having been given strict instructions from my housemates, I had sneakily bought 3 Tupperware containers with me in my bag, and so me & my mum made it our mission to not go home empty handed.
Honestly, I don't think I've ever laughed so hard as when mum came back to the table, proudly carrying a huge plate heaped with about 200 gummy milk bottles.
We managed to squish everything into the boxes, and we headed home with one box of sweets, and two rammed with lemon chicken.
Amount Spent: Nothing
Mood: It's Bill Bailey, from Have I Got-Never Mind The-Black Books-QI-for you!
Top tip of the day: Take plastic containers and be ninja-thieves when you visit an all-you-can-eat buffet

Thursday
Okay, so it turns out reheated lemon chicken isn't great, so I've basically just been left with enough sweets to put anyone into a coma.
I didn't have uni today (I have so many days off! I mean, I love my course, but it feels silly paying £8600 a year when I only have 3 days in!!) so again, I wasn't tempted by the hot food on offer there.
Basic pasta for lunch, and a bit of everything from my freezer drawer for dinner- it was one of those nights where I though 'Hey, this mini pizza will go great with roast parsnips and a naan bread!'
I don't know how I got into that very dark place, but I am older & wiser now.
Amount Spent: Nothing
Mood: WHYYYY
Top tip of the day: If you're mixing food types like this, you should probably take a day off. Or a week off, depending on how bad your sugar coma is from all those sweets.

Friday
Today I had a full day at uni!
I know, right?! A full day!!! It's like what I'm paying for is actually reasonable!
But having spent an entire day in the computer room, when it came to lunch time, I just couldn't bring myself to dig into the cereal I had bought with me.
I'm afraid I did a terrible thing- I bought a jacket potato
*gasps*
I couldn't help it! It was more tempting than a photo opportunity is to a politician!
But, it was the best jacket potato of my life.
Any and all inner turmoil I had going on about losing my challenge disappeared the moment I took the first bite. It was so soft, and exactly what I needed.
Amount Spent- £3.00
Mood: Bite me.
Top tip of the day: Maybe treating yourself once in a while is a good thing. But if you really cant spend anything, getting up 10 minutes earlier to make something more tempting than dry cereal is a good idea.

Saturday
So I was definitely feeling guilty about my jacket potato, and found myself obsessing over whether I'm just a really weak person or not.
I came to the conclusion that in most things, I'm pretty strong.
But when it comes to food, sleep, exercise, or anything to do with owls, I'm weaker than the watered-down alcohol you get at weddings.
So to cheer myself up, for lunch I decided to make myself onion bruschetta! (Think really posh cheese on toast)
It was amazing, and the recipe is as follows:

1.      Chop 2 onions, place in a frying pan and put on the hob on a low heat.
2.      Add 2 tablespoons of oil, 1 of balsamic vinegar, and at least 4 spoons of sugar.
3.      If you have some red wine laying around, add that too.
4.      Simmer for about 40-60 minutes on  the low heat until the onion marmalade becomes sticky & soft and the liquid is soaked up.
5.      Cut crusty bread into inch-thick slices, drizzle on a little oil and sprinkle on some chopped garlic (1 clove does 4 slices)
6.      Spread the onion marmalade onto the bread evenly, and top with slices of cheese (cheddar or goats cheese works well)
7.      Put the oven onto the grill setting (or just a really high temperature) and pop the slices in.
8.      Grill for about 6 minutes, until the cheese starts to bubble.
9.      Serve immediately and enjoy the best lunch EVER :D

Amount Spent: Nothing

Mood: Aww yiss!

Top tip of the day: Definitely brush your teeth after eating these- they taste amazing but gives you garlic breath.

Sunday

I spent most of Sunday with Dan, which was really nice. We watched a load of Firefly (best TV series EVER) and just had a pretty chilled day.
When it came to dinner, we really didn't fancy anything he had in his cupboard (no surprise there, he's a typical guy when it comes to food) so we went to Wetherspoons and he paid which was really sweet!
Usually I insist on going Dutch for meals out etc. but as this was my week of scrooge-ness, he treated me.
Amount Spent: Nothing
Mood: Very happy
Top tip of the day: If possible, have a nice boyfriend who doesn't mind treating you once in a while.

Result:
So throughout the  whole week, I only spent £3.00, which I think is pretty good going!
I wouldn't say that I've learnt anything in particular, but I know that my bank balance is looking pleased.
If this were one of those school science experiments that you had to prepare and write up, it would look like this:

· Question: Can Sammie go a week without spending anything?
· Hypothesis: Probably not.
· Observations: I did pretty well, but its fair to say I relied on my friends and family quite a bit.
· Conclusion: I can do it, it just requires more will power than I currently possess...

Have any of you challenged yourselves to do something like this? If so, how did it go?
Let me know :)
Sammie
xoxo

 

My Money-Saving Challenge!

Hello. toasters!
It's safe to say that my wallet is more than a little empty, what with student finance messing me around (I STILL don't have anything!) and me having to shell out for a new railcard and train tickets.
So, I have set my self the challenge of spending absolutely nothing for an entire week.
That's right... I will try my utmost to spend nothing at all, not on food, bus fares, or any cute vintage items that catch my eye on Ebay
(Yes, even if they are such a bargain)
I share my house with 5 other students and we split everything evenly, so of course bills and money for toilet roll etc. don't count for this challenge, so I definitely wont be the annoying 'can I owe it to you?' friend.
But aside from that, I will basically see what its like to run on empty for a week.
Hopefully I have enough pasta in the cupboard to last me...
I'll let you know how it goes!
Sammie
xoxo

Adjusting to life as a student

Hello, toasters!

I'm about a month deep into my second year of uni.
Especially since moving back into my family home for 4 months over summer, I have realised some of the things that make student life... well, studenty.

One thing you never have to think about when merrily living at home is doing the shopping.
I never realised how expensive cheese was!
And yes, you can get the £1 'cheese' from Iceland, but its so rubbery that if you drop it, it will bounce back up and punch you in the face.

Never before have I been quite so precious about nectar points.
So what if I only spent £1.27?
I need those points!
It's seriously becoming a problem- like as if I'm addicted to drugs.
The other day I spent £2.50 in Sainsbury's, walked halfway home before I realised I hadn't collected my points, and went back to get them!
What is my life turning into?!?!
And then, when you get home, you have to try and fit everything into your one little freezer drawer.
I can definitely say, that I have become a master of this.
It's like an expert game of Tetris in my freezer drawer.
Life Skill = Gained. Thanks, University.

Whilst I love my house, you do have to get used to some really odd combinations of mis-matched furniture.
In my living room for example, we have two sofas- one a forest green and one a brilliant red that makes your eyes hurt if you look at it in daylight.
I know that's not really a huge sticking point, but it does make you appreciate the purposefully styled rooms at your family home when you go back.

One thing I have learnt about myself is that I'm actually a pretty good cook!
(See a recent post here that has one of my recipes)
This came as a huge shock to everyone, as before my Dad used to joke that I could burn water.
But no, I actually buy fresh ingredients, combine them in interesting ways and I have never, ever eaten a pot noodle.
The worst thing that happened to me kitchen-wise was my very first attempt to cook when I first moved in as a fresher.
I was cooking a pizza (very simple, I know) and so I just put it in the oven and waited.
There were only two problems to this plan...
1. Our oven has no temperature markings. You turn the dial, but the markings have long since rubbed off. So, to start with, it was like a fun game. I think I must have turned it around to what I believe is about 300 degrees that night.
2. After I put the pizza into what must have been a furnace, I became distracted. I can't remember what I was distracted by, but as I am an art student, it was probably something like a butterfly or my own boobs.
So when I eventually remembered I was cooking something (probably about 40 minutes later) it came out looking pretty burnt.
And by pretty burnt, I mean 100x more burnt than the stereotypical English guy who falls asleep on holiday in Spain in the sun all day and has to go around looking like a tomato for 3 months after.
So if having a pizza that was blacker than a politicians heart wasn't bad enough, I only went and dropped it on the floor!
I think I may have cried at this point. Or again, became distracted by my own boobs.
I just know that I definitely missed the 3-second-rule time limit.
But still, I was just so hungry, I picked it up and ate the bits that were still recognisable as a pizza.
This, dear toasters, is a fact I am not proud of, so please don't judge me!

Doing the washing is also something that gets me.
Because my laundry basket is only being filled by me, it takes a long time to get full.
And even when it is full, you do the same thing you do with the bins and squash it all down so it will last a little longer.
So I'd say that wash day only comes up every 2 weeks.
But when it does come up, I do 5 washes (1 white, 2 colours, 2 black washes) in a row and EVERYTHING is hung out to dry in my room.
So for about 2 or 3 days, I cant move in my own room, it becomes a rainforest of clothing.
Sometimes, its kinda cool.
I can make a slightly-damp blanket fort out of the set of sheets I've washed and hide away from the outside world and the concept of 'doing work'.

I will leave you on this note- Internet shopping is your best friend and your worst enemy rolled into one!
Yes, you can get some amazing deals that make your life (and bank balance) so much better.
But, be warned.
The other day, I went through my Ebay purchase history and realised quite how much stuff I had bought.
And by stuff, I mean things that I love, but if I'm being very honest with myself, it could be classed as 'crap I don't need'.
For example, today my Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends DVD came in the post!
Now don't get me wrong- I loved this show!
But if I'm honest, the £3 I paid for this could have been spent on something a little more nessecary. Like stationary. Or a subway.

Oooooh, I want a subway now!

So my question to you all is this: What have you found to be the hardest thing about adjusting to student life? Let me know in the comments!
And don't forget to subscribe if you like my content, so you'll be notified when I post more :)
Sammie
xoxo

Boscombe Vintage Fair

Hello, toasters!
So yesterday, my housemates and I went to Boscombe Vintage Market!


My housemate looking around the Market...
Not sure that E.T. plushie is technically 'vintage'
but oh well...

It was actually recommended to us by our tutors, as for our homework task we needed to find vintage items from different decades- best homework ever, right?!

Despite the annoying bus schedule- there was only one every hour- we made it there in reasonable time and had a good look around.
It wasn't a massive market- probably about 20 stalls in all- but in true Vintage style, every surface was crammed with beautiful wares.
Now when going to a vintage fair, I feel the best way to approach it is similar to how the majority of us approach Primark- the trick is to sort through the crap.
Yes, that blotchy shirt may be from the 1970s, but there's a reason the guy is so desperately trying to sell it to you.
Just because it's old doesn't mean it's fantastic.
However, once you sort through the stuff that was definitely never in fashion, you get some pretty amazing finds.
For example, my housemate found an amazing dress that was an 80s reproduction of a 1950s evening dress- she has no idea where she'll actually be able to wear it, but it still doesn't detract from the fact that it's beautiful and only cost her £35!


My new baby! From now on, EVERYTHING will be
typed, even my shopping list for Lidl.

And I found a beautiful 1950s Princess 300 typewriter in fabulous condition! It came in its original case, which I can lock with a small key (to stop those oh-so-common typewriter thieves we hear about all the time) and it came with a typing course instruction manual which was published in 1963.
I had a quick look through the booklet when I got home, and as well as words that have fallen out of use- such as 'ist'- I found random derogatory racist terms scattered casually through the typing exercises... I just found it funny to imagine a man from 1963 tapping out the N word 10 times over to practice his typing and him not thinking anything of it! Definitely a sign of how the times have changed...
I need to buy some new ribbon, and oil the moving parts, but I am so happy with my find.
When I was little, I used to have a plastic toy typewriter, and I've wanted a proper one for years. I think the lady knew that it would be going to a good home, which also helped me get the price down from £45 to £35!
(The use of the 'I'm a poor student' plea worked wonders too)

The problem is, coming home from the vintage market, I now want to re-style my whole room to have a vintage feel.
The problem is, most of my room uses bright blues and reds, so it would take a little more than my student budget to cover it. (To the left is a scale model version of my student room to give you an idea of how it currently looks)
Also, I don't really dress in a vintage style, so I'd probably feel a little out of place.
So now my problem is this- how can I combine my existing room with new, inexpensive finds to give it an old-fashioned feel?!
I'll have to get back to you on that one...
Sammie
xoxo

Why I hate Student Finance England & what I would do to them if I had the chance...

So I am an art student, entering into my second year at University.
Or, at least, I hope I will be.
Because, although I have achieved very respectable grades, I might not be let back in.
Why, you might ask?
Well lets turn to Student Finance England for that one.
It turns out these assholes haven't processed my application yet. Not any one of the three applications that I have sent them, over the course of several months. And I need to sort my tuition fee payments before I can re-enrol.

So as I was having a delightful discussion with one of their employees on the phone today (by 'delightful', I mean not at all useful and almost impossible to understand due to his thick Irish accent), you can imagine my delight at being told vague answers to quite straight forward applications.
Me: 'When will I know about the status of my application?'
SFE: 'Every application is different. It could be fourty milliseconds, it could be three lightyears from now'
Me: 'Have you even received my application? I sent the last one more than three weeks ago by recorded delivery'
SFE :'Everything we receive by post takes up to 10 days to be scanned into the system. I have no record of it being in the system'
Me: 'But I sent it more than twenty one days ago'
SFE: 'Oh look, a butterfly'
*Student Finance England then hangs up on me*
Absolutely. Freaking. Delightful.

What I don't understand is how clearly understaffed they are.
What, they can't hire a few more people to scan in postal orders, or look through forms to see that everything is in check?
Yes, I know that students are a large demographic, but seriously? It's not like you can pretend to be surprised by these numbers
You do the same thing year in year out.
Hasn't one person in the company got the common sense to think hmmm, it's only Frank and Bob down there, scanning in the entire student populations' application forms, maybe we should hire a couple more people to help.
10 days to literally just scan a few pages?! Is that a joke?

Take a minute to think about it... have you ever actually known anyone, anyone at all, that has had a good experience with this company?
.....
well?
I bet the answer is no.
Student Finance England: Forever screwing people over from possibly the most financially vulnerable demographic there is.

And another thing that makes this whole situation even more unbearable?
When I go on to their website, they proudly announce the launch of their new student finance magazine!
So instead of actually getting work done, you've been pissing around releasing a magazine that no-one will ever read unless they are stuck on a desert island, and it's the only piece of literature available. And maybe not even then.
Cheers for that, SFE.

So here is a list of what I would do to the Student Finance England company, had I the chance:

1. I would lock them in a room with Keith Lemon and Janet Street-Porter.
2. I would spend my entire maintenance loan- if it ever arrives- on cooking oil. I would boil said oil, and then dip each member of staff in. (I realise this one is a bit dark, but then again, I'm pretty angry and upset right now)
3. I would superglue headphones to their ears and put 'Friday' on repeat.
4. I would enter them into the Hunger Games
5. I would visit their offices, and glue everything to the ceiling- chairs, desks, papers and all (Just like the monkeys did in Roald Dahl's The Twits)
6. I would leave them on the edge of outer space.
7. I would make them sit through Gordon Brown reading the whole of the Old Testament, and every time they fell asleep, they'd lose a finger. 
8. I would drop them in North Korea with an important-looking briefcase containing documents written in code.
9. I would attach them to Jedward, one on each hip.
10. I would make them go back to University, and apply for a loan through their own system.

Okay, rant over.
And I've got to say, I feel a little better already.
Next time, I promise I'll be more upbeat!
I just seriously needed to get that off my chest
See you next time,
Sammie
xoxo

P.S. If you hate them as much as I do, take a look at the Board members page on their website. I think this is good for a couple of reasons...
1. It helps direct your anger.
2. I found slight relief in laughing at their awful photographs, mainly because two thirds of them look like the socially-awkward guests at a barbeque. The ones where the other guests spend well over an hour debating if they'll ever get laid, and if there's any truth in the claim they have an Oedipus complex.